Insanity/Not Insanity Part 3 The Final Laugh Type: AGALAIAHR/A Disclamer: I don't own any JQ related characters HB (dang them) does. Lex owns the JQ2k. Warner Bros. owns something in this fic ( can't tell ya cause it would ruin the story) Squaresoft owns someone. This Tekechi (or however you spell his name. Or is that SM? It has to deal with Ranma 1/2 anyway) dude owns Ranma. THe people I used in this fic I didn't ask permish and I'm sorry. Flame me if you must. But I just had to! You can correct me if I'm wrong.. KK? Archivers: go for it Jonny: Welcome to the very last addition to Insanity/Not Insanity. Hope you have enjyod your stay. Insanity. ------ Hadji and Jonny were flying a plane. Actually Hadji was driving and Jonny was making himself useful by staying out of the way. A beeping sound eminated from the control panel and Jonny glanced at it. " Hey Hadj?" " Yes?" Hadji asked, flipping a switch. " What does the E stand for on the fuel indicator?" " Empty." " Ah." The blond sat back in his seat and began scribbling on a peice of paper. " Just out of curiosity why do you ask?" " Because the little dial thingy says were empty." " WHAT?" Hadji screamed. " I said..." " I HEARD what you said. Oh this is not good! Very Bad!" " What?" " Jonny, I'm afraid we are going to die." " Slammin'! Never done that before!" Just then something sputtered and the plane nose dived. **Somewhere far below** A creature in a black robe sat at a table, carefully studying the objects before him. They were objects of extreme importance, one thing wrong with them could shred the very fabric of time itself. " So? Whatcha got?" another black cloaked figure asked, sitting across from the first one. The first one narrowed his eyes. " Why? What you got?" " Three of a kind." The first thing groaned and slapped his cards on the table. They were a pair of two's an Ace and a three. " You win." Then an alarm went off. A little spirit flew into the room. " Excuse me, but Disaster? You have a job to do." The first thing nodded and stood up. " See ya later Murder, oh and tell Accident that he still owes me ten bucks." " No prob." **Cue opening song** ~opening song cued.~ It's Hadji and the blond, Hadji and the blond. One is a cutie, the others just wrong. They died one fateful day, but their not gone away, they annoyed Death until, he let them stay. Their Hadji, Hadji and the blond, blond, blond, blond, bloond! Jonny: What we gonna do today Hadji? Narf! Hadji: The same thing we do every day Jonny, Jonny: Oooh! Watch the Brady Bunch until our heads explode? Hadji: NO! Were going to try to take over the....er....try to get back to life! Jonny: Awww... Disaster: Hello, and welcome to your doom...oom...oom. Jonny: Nice echo affect! Poit! How'd Ya do that? Hadji: It's all Movie magic Jonny. Jonny: OOh! Is he going to pull a rabbit out of his hat Hadji? Hadji: Jonny, you have just said something stupid. Get me the corrector. *Jonny pales and pulls out a mallet. Hadji whaps him over the head with it* Disaster: If you will just follow me... Jonny: Were we goin'? Donk! Hadji: To our doom...oom..oom I suppose. Jonny: Oh! Uhhh, Hadji? Hadji: Yes? Jonny: Whats a oom oom? Hadji: Are you stupid on purpose? Jonny: No, I think I was born this way. Wonk! Disaster: Comon'! Aren't you gonna follow me? Hadji: Why? Doing so would just mean our deaths. Jonny: Besides I've got a Jerry Springer show to watch! Narf! Disaster: FINE! Then I'll send YOU TO HE.... Hadji: WATCH IT! This is a kids show! Jonny: Maybe he ment to say Hellie's Yodeling Festival! Oh! Can we go Hadj? Can we? Hadji: NO! Good Geepers NO! Distaster: heh heh. Hadji: NOOOOOO!!!! *Disaster lifts his hand and a plot hole opens which Jonny and Hadji fall through. Hadji lands in a room. Alone. It is a small room with white padded walls and a tiny window in the door looking out into the hall.* Hadji: Wh...where am I. Voice: Your at the races. Hadji: Whats that? And Where are You? Voice: I'm in the cell right next to you. The races. The Groupie races. Your set free on a track and a buncha groupies are set after ya. But thats not so bad. No. Thats not the half of it. Hadji: Why? Voice: Three things. 1. Their on pogo sticks. Hadji: Thats not so bad. Voice: Two. Your stripped naked. Hadji: Well. There's worse then that. *twitches.* Voce: and three *the voice wavers.* Hadji: what? Voice: You have to spend three hours ALONE with the winner. *starts to sob* Hadji: How bad can it be? Voice: These are not just ANY groupies. There RABID groupies. Hadji: uuhhhh. Voice: The kind that want to tear the clothes off your body. Hadji: Oh dear. Voice: Thats an understatment. *a tv screen is lowered from the celeing and it shows a stadium full of fans and a race track.* Andrea: Welcome Boy's and Goyles. Young and old. Hard core movie fans and anime buffs alike. THis is the GROUPIE RACES! Sharon: LET'S GET READY TO RUUNNN! Andrea: First lets meet our contestants. Sharon: On the black pogo stick is Butcher-Chan. Have any thing to say? Butcher: Hi Mom! Andrea: On the red pogo stick is Aeris! Aeris: Heh heh. Sharon: And finally, on the green pogo stick is Tifa. No one woulda guessed. Tifa: Comon' Lets go! *the crowd cheers* Andrea: Our first vic...er...chasee as it were is Sephiroth. Sharon: That silver haired, mako eyed, god wannabe has wormed his way into many female's hearts. Or at least their infatuation. But since he is evil, he was not set free after saved from death. He was sent here to run for all time. Andrea: He's coming out onto the track... *a very scared Sephiroth is led onto the track. He has a black bathrobe on. The bathrobe is ripped off and the groupies begin the chase* Sharon: AND THEIR OFF! Butcher is in the lead followed closely by Tifa with Aeris straggling behind. Andrea: Whats this? Aeris is picking up speed! *five laps later. Hadji's terrified eyes are glued to the screen.* Sharon: Looks like Sephiroth is tireing. Andrea: Just to recap, Butcher is neck and neck with Aeris, but Tifa is still hangin' in there. *ten laps later* Hadji: When does this end? Voice: When either you collapse or the groupies collapse. *begins to sob again* Hadji: What if the groupies collapse first? Voice: Then the one that collapsed last wins. Sharon: And thats it folks! Sephiroth has collapsed. Uh oh! The groupies are starting to swarm him! Andrea: It looks like the Groupie Control is handling it fine. It looks like Aeris is the winner. Hadji: Oh my. Voice: No kidding. Sharon: So Aeris how does it feel? Aeris: Just great! Andrea: May we ask. Just what are you going to do with your...prize? Aeris: Payback time! Sephiroth: Mommy! Sharon: and now for our commercial break. But don't go away! We have to more rounds of Fun and Excitement here at The Groupie Races. *the screen blacks* Hadji: Do they do this to females too? Voice: What are you kidding? No! They'd get sued! Hadji: Well can't you just run out of the race? I mean there must be a way. Voice: No. Because A. There are armed gaurds and B. You have a chip surgicly implanted in your brain. It knocks you unconciouss if you try to run and they don't stop the groupies when they swarm. Hadji: This is not good! Very Bad! *begins to shake* *Meanwhile at Hellie's Yodeling Festival.* Hellie: Yoodle aye Hee hoo! *Jonny claps* Jonny: Yay! Yay! Too bad Hadji is missing this. I wonder where he is? Nong! *back at the races.* Voice over Loudspeaker: Ranma! Be prepared to run! Voice:NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! Voice over Loudspeaker: Yessss! Hadji: I wish you luck my freind. Voice: Thanks. Hadji: Why are you here? Ranma: They promised me water from the Spring of Drowned boy. I took it but now I pay the price! Hadji: For how long? *begins to sob again* Hadji: Oh my. Ranma: NOOO! GET AWAY! BACK! BACK! NOOO!!! Female: Hold still! Geesh! *there is scilence. The screen comes back to life.* Sharon: and welcome back to the show! Lets meet our new contestants. Andrea: On the black pogo stick is Kodachi. Kodachi: Mwhahahahahaaaaaaaaa!!! Sharon: On the red is Shampoo. Shampoo: Ranma Mine! Andrea: and on the green, another unsuspected racer, Lita aka Sailor Jupiter! Lita: Hey all! *blows kisses* Sharon: and here comes the chasee. Ranma. *crowd cheers. Ranma is in a red bathrobe for about two seconds.* Andrea: Off they go! *twenty laps later.* Sharon: Whoa! What a race! Kodachi surprisingly dropped out. But Shampoo and Lita are still hanging in there. Andrea: Shampoo is in the lead but Lita is closing fast. Sharon: Ranma looks like he's tiring. Andrea: Oh! Shampoo tripped! It looks like Lita is the winner! Shampoo: Ai-ya. Sharon: So Lita, how are you? Lita: Tired, but not THAT tired. *casts a wicked glance at the cowering Ranma* Andrea: Well. Time for another commerical. But we have still one more round to go! So come back! *The screen blacks. There is noise in the hall and Sephiroth is shoved into Hadji's cell.* Hadji: Hello. Sephiroth: Mommy, mommy. *He has a black eye and bruses over his body that is now covered (authours note: aww! >:P) with a grey uniform.) Hadji: Oh, my freind. You do not look so good. Sephiroth: Are you my mommy? Hadji: No.. Sephiroth: Mommy. *slumps in corner. Pulls a little blankie out of a box beside the wall along with a teddy bear and beigns to suck his thumb and pull at his hair. Hadji looks at him terrified.* Voice over Loudspeaker: Hadji get ready. Hadji: Bad! Bad! Very Bad! *the door opens and Alexis pokes her head in* Alexis: oh hey Hadj. Sorry to have to do this to ya but... * two women come in and pick him up. Then they strip him and put him in a green bathrobe.* Andrea: Welcome back. Lets meet our final contestants. There's Ina-chan on the black. Ina-chan: Hello peoples! Andrea: Jessie on the red. *Jessie waves.* Andrea: and our very own Sharon on the green. Sharon: What can I say? I couldn't pass it up! *the race begins and Hadji runs for his life. Sharon falls flat on her face the first jump and is disqualified. The race lasts for about two laps and Hadji trips. * Andrea: Oops. Looks like Ina-chans the winner. I'm sorry Sharon. Sharon: Hey! No prob! Andrea: So, what is circling through your head, Ina? Ina-chan: Hadji all mine! hee hee! All mine! Hadji: This is not good! *back in the Limbo sleeping room.* Jonny: Hey! I just got back from the festival! Gee that was fun! Narf! Disaster: And you get to do it tommorow and the next day and the next. Jonny: YAY! Did you hear that Hadji? Hadji: Do, Re, Me, Fa, so! Will I...I go back? Distaster: Yep! Everyday! And not all the races will be the same Hadji: Do, Re, mE! Fa! Fa! Do! Re! Me! *bursts out sobbing.* Their Hadji, Hadji and the blond blond blond blond blooonnd! ----- Jonny: Narf! uhh I mean cool! Not Insanity. ---- Hadji and Jonny were flying a plane. Actually Hadji was driving and Jonny was making himself useful by staying out of the way. A beeping sound eminated from the control panel and Jonny glanced at it. " Hey Hadj?" " Do, Re, Me Fa!!!! Fa so Re! Me So So!" " Haaadji." " Me SOOOOO!!" the sultan screamed. His voice cracked and Jonny winced. " Hadj! STOP! YOU BEEN SINGING THAT FOR THREE HOURS!" " LA! LA! TI! SO! DO! RAY! FA! FA!" Jonny's eye develops a twitch and drool starts to come from his mouth. " I'M WARNING YOU!" " MEEEEEE!!!!!" Suddenly Jonny's worldwent black. Sharon: and Welcome to the Groupie Races. Our first contestants of the day are on the black pogo stick...Mishelle Mishelle: Heh Heh. Sharon: On the red, Jade. Jade: I can't wait. Sharon: Y'know I didn't see that one coming. Anywhoo, last but not least. Andrea! Andrea: Hi! Who won? Who do you think? Heh heh. --- Meet.... Ronald (hi) Sephiroth (Help Me!) Kiken (cooL) Yateth (was up?) 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